I have been a tad quiet on the blogging front of late. I had every ounce of motivation at the beginning of the week and as the week progressed, it slowly drifted out the window.
The de-motivation kicked in after I saw my Dr on the Monday. Words in which I wanted to hear were not said. I was NOT happy.
After I saw him the week prior and he examined my scan results and proceeded to give me the ol’ sweep, I had in my head:
It’s OK, if the sweep doesn’t bring labour on naturally, he will induce me at the end of next week.
How wrong was I?!
I walked into his office on Monday and I asked if I could still be induced … no, I would really like you to get to 38 weeks.
OK then – why would you offer it to me only days prior then?
He examined me and said that the sweep definitely got things moving along but he wasn’t sure how early bubs would come. Can doctors really tell when babies will decide to enter this world?! Don’t babies work off their own agenda?
Dis-heartened is definitely something I was now feeling. I understood that of course where the baby was, was the best and healthiest place for it to be, but when you have been pregnant for 8.5 months and all of the pains and troubles are causing you discomfort and you hear the words would you like to be induced next week? You certainly cling to those words … words of hope … words of encouragement … you can do this, only one week to go.
Unfortunately these words had now been revoked and I was back to counting on this baby and I having a fabulous relationship from day one because he/she decided to meet us on a day that meant I wouldn’t miss out on Aunty Claire’s wedding and wouldn’t be getting served Turkey from a hospital kitchen.
So as I spend the evening of my 38th week writing down my thoughts, I am secretly hoping that I go into labour tonight and if not tonight, then an induction on Monday, 19th would be LOVELY.
Pregnancy for an anally-retentive person is not an ideal situation.
My sister made the comment to me today ‘you haven’t enjoyed pregnancy have you?!’.
I believe the last 2-3 weeks have made her think that I have hated every second of it, which is definitely not true. Unfortunately these past few weeks have been the hardest, even harder than throwing up 6 times a day at the beginning. I am up anywhere from 2 to 5 times a night to use the bathroom, each time I roll myself out of bed and place my feet on the ground, in those first few steps I feel an excruciating amount of pain shoot up my heel into my ankle, the amount of pressure on my feet is now realised after lying down for so long. The way I lie turns bubs into all sorts of positions which in turn makes my tummy feel all achy. Last night I experienced contraction like feelings when I got back into bed at 4:23am … my immediate thoughts were OMG this is it unfortunately after 3 lots of tightening pain it dwindled.
The heat that Perth has been on the receiving end of certainly isn’t helping. Normally a 30 degree day wouldn’t faze me – however carrying around this extra weight and trying to stay cool is proving to be difficult.
I have decided that we must be having a boy … in no hurry to come and meet us … couldn’t possibly be a girl.